Why does the dog wag its tail?
Because the dog is smarter than the tail.
If the tail were smarter, it would wag the dog.
When someone really important dies, it ripples through everyone else's lives in interesting ways. Last May I lost my father. He was young. Too young. And healthy and strong all the way up until... well, until he wasn't anymore. From the time he found out to the time he died was about 5 months. From the time he told me until the time he died was 1 and a half. I wasn't ready. Can you ever be?
It will be a year on May 25, and I've realized in the past week or so that everything has changed. The way I think has changed. What is important to me has changed. I've come to understand that I have not been living my life. Instead, I have allowed distraction after distraction to take over. I've been missing things. It is now time for a change.
Real change takes a long time. So rather than planning to wake up early tomorrow as a whole new me--and then sleeping in because I'm not all that new--I'm going to spend the next week making a list of things that I think will make my life a better place to live. These won't necessarily be goals, but they will be my road map. I will post it here and review it periodically. Maybe it will help someone else. I have often made lists of goals and daily schedules that have all been too big--too much--and quickly floated away into oblivion. This time, I'm going to go slow and steady.
The one thing that I am doing now is the big step I've made toward a richer life. I dropped Facebook. I made a post that reads that I'm done there. I posted my phone number for people who want it, and asked them to text me theirs if they want me to have it. I'm going to re-post that on Friday for all the weekenders, and on Sunday night my presence on Facebook will be no more. I have also deleted Google+ and LinkedIn. Neither of which are of any value at this stage their or my existence, respectively. My internet presence now consists of Amazon, Pinterest, and Instagram accounts, and, obviously, this blog in which I pretend I am helping society when I am in fact equally as narcissistic as any other blogger.
People often talk about how much Facebook negatively effects their relationships. If not theirs, the tend to shake their fists at the younger, texting generation and lament about the inability for their children to actually talk to anyone or to write in English instead of TXT TLK. What amuses me is how often they do this on Facebook or other similarly offensive sites.
I've always used the excuse that I've traveled so much in my life that I simply can't keep up with all the people all over the world that I care about without the help of this intermediary. In truth, I'm not keeping up with anyone. I know little details, but nothing real. So why does it matter about the funny exchange my friend in Texas had with a grocery store clerk, if I don't know how they feel about... anything... at all.
Another excuse for keeping it is that I've missed out on events in the past when I wasn't on Facebook to get the e-vite. Bullshit. Have you ever seen the movie He's Just Not That In To You? I should probably ask if you've read the book, but I haven't, so that has no bearing. Mine is, without a doubt, in to me, so I didn't feel the need to read it when it came out. A Drew Barrymore movie, though, will get me every time. There was a point made in that movie (and probably the book) that if a man wants you he will find a way to be with you. The same thing goes for friends. If I am wanted at a party, I'll get invited. Someone will realize I'm not on the e-vite list and will call me. If they don't, they just aren't that in to me, and that's okay.
That's it. No more of Facebook wagging the Randi. I'm taking control.
